by WindUpDoll
These results shows are sheer artistry in their filler. There is absolutely no reason to watch the results show, except to find out who gets the boot. And to see the cheesy group number. But, if Idol only gave us what we wanted, the show would last about 5 minutes.
So after some stupid ripping on Simon tics, we finally get the cheesy group number. Oh, man, David Cook is wearing that stupid tux t-shirt. And it’s faded. Can he leave, please? It’s Thursday, and that means extensions for most of the girls. Robbie Britney boy is going skull-themed. Jason John Henson is wearing a striped shirt to coordinate with his striped hair. Kady Malloy still looks dead. Kathy notes that Brooke looks like a purse. They’re all very positive. Oh, yeah, and they were singing a ’70s medley.
First to get the axe — one of the guys. Blah, blah, blah, dim the lights, make the kids sweat, until we get to John Jason Henson. We won’t be seeing his smile, or stripe, anymore. That’s ok, he would’ve been gone on death metal night anyway.
And second, a girl gets to go — oh, and snap! It’s Alexandrea Lushington. Didn’t think she would get the axe — especially since Amanda was sitting next to her. Hmmm. And Danny was next to Jason. Hmm. I think they’re trying to psyche me out again.
We’re sticking with the girls, since it would be a hassle to have them switch again. And again, surprisingly it’s Alaina. I wasn’t expecting her to go, and neither was she. Ryan even seems choked up. Then he goes all cheesy & talks about ‘raw emotion’ and ‘shocking’ results. Oh, Ryan. Daughtry getting voted off was shocking. We’ve got too many of them for any elimination to really be shocking.
We have to fill more time, so how about a recap of last year’s Idol Gives Back! Man, am I glad I can fast-forward through this. Watching a results show in real-time is just torture.
Last person to get the axe — the wigger is gone. Bye, Robbie Britney boy. But, man, that means I have to hear Luke again next week. Eeessch.
Ok, to recap — Jason, Alexandrea, Alaina and Robbie are gone. We’re down to 8 guys & 8 girls, and my Danny is still safe to bring the fabulous. Hooray!
He better bring it next week. We’re finally close to the top 12 on American Idol.