By Mike Frey and johnnysweeptheleg
It may be a little too late to help, but we’re going to begin this week with some basic information regarding the year 1977. Jimmy Carter is the current president of the United States, Fleetwood Mac has just released the album Rumours, Roots is the TV event of the year, Elvis Presley is going to die — and Hurley cannot pass for 46 years old. Remind us never to take the big guy back in time with us. Not only is he fairly conspicuous because of his size, but dude cracks under pressure big time. Having said that, his scene with Dr Pierre Chang/Marvin Candle was the highlight of a pretty damn good episode of Lost last night. Here’s the recap.
johnnysweeptheleg’s Lost in a Moment:
Daniel Faraday has been shot in the back by his own mother, so things are already looking grim for the team even before Jack gets Charlton Heston’d by a horse-riding ape Charles Widmore. But after going through her son’s journal, Eloise is suddenly receptive to anything. Jack explains to Kate and Eloise that if they do exactly what’s in the book, they can undo all of this. Eloise seems poised to try this. And it reminds me to try using this same explanation, only with a copy of the Kama Sutra in hand, next time I am on that island.
All they have to do is go un-bury the H-bomb. Right, says Eloise, about that … the Dharma Initiative is kinda, sorta built over it.
Speaking of the Dharma Initiative, they’re in all sorts of turmoil of their own. Radzinsky is pummeling Sawyer and threatening his life if he doesn’t give away Kate’s whereabouts. And Phil begins slapping around Juliet, as the very act of his hitting a handcuffed woman can secure his fate of eventually dying a horribly memorable death on the island.
With Horace and Radzy playing “Good Cop, Bad Cop,” the rest of the island is running around with terror sirens blaring. Hurley, Jin, and Miles are about to hightail it to the beach, when Chang approaches them. It seems Faraday’s words began making sense to Chang. Hurley finally buckles and admits that they’re from the future, with Miles even confirming that he’s Chang’s son. Like that, Chang’s aboard and runs off to order the island’s evacuation.
When he gets back, though, he’s surprised to find Sawyer and Juliet bloodied and held hostage. Radzinsky doesn’t want to allow the evacuation. But Sawyer backs Chang up, and says if they put all of the women and children on that sub, as well as allowing him and Juliet to leave as well, he’ll tell them everything they want to know about. Radzinsky agrees as long as Sawyer draws a map to the hostiles.
Speaking of, Jack and Kate are still in hostile territory with Alpert, Eloise, and some hostile goons that are only along so that they can get shot by former professional Laser Tag champion, Sayid. Jack and Kate rock/paper/scissors to determine who has to tell Sayid that they saved Little Ben’s life and basically undid everything Sayid risked his life for. Kate wasn’t about to let a child die, and she certainly doesn’t like Jack’s idea of potentially blowing everyone up via H-bomb, so she decides to abandon them and head back to the same camp where her Sawyer-poo just so happens to also be.
Alpert reaches into his fannypack to apply his waterproof guyliner, and dives into the river in order to swim to the underground tunnels leading to the H-bomb. Jack and Eloise follow, as does Sayid, surprising Jack. Sayid says that either this crazy plan is going to work or it’s going to backfire and blow everyone up, putting them out of their misery and finally ending this crazy escapade once and for all. Hey, Sayid makes sense.
Back at the submarine, Hurley and Miles watch Sawyer and Juliet climb into the submarine. But just prior to undocking, Kate third wheels the sub trip right in the middle of Sawyer and Juliet “I wuving” each other. That trip just got a little less comfortable.
So what’s happening 30 years in the future? Well, Locke and Alpert finally reunite after not seeing one another for the last three years. Ben explains to Sun that Alpert’s an Adviser and has had that job for a very long time. Which, in this economic climate, makes Guyliner’s bloated salary a large target for elimination.
Sun shows Alpert the Dharma photo, to which he responds that of course he remembers them – he watched them all die. Locke, who switched deodorant and is more confident than ever, tells Sun he’s going to try to fix that. He demands to be taken to Jacob after they make a quick trip to the other plane. The other plane?
Locke explains to Alpert that in a few moments, a man will appear, and he’ll have roughly three minutes to help remove a bullet from his leg, while convincing him to die in order to bring his friends back. Just then, the man appears in the jungle, causing Alpert and Ben to WTF in their pants at the very sight of Locke #2. Alpert does as he’s told, Locke #2 vanishes before their eyes, and it’s at this moment when he’s walking back that I realize it looks like Richard Alpert has been raiding Jeff Probst’s wardrobe, lately.
Alpert mentions to Locke that at least he didn’t actually have to die after all. Oh, but I did, says Locke as he turns to look at Ben. And now we know why Locke needed to bring Ben along on this jungle journey.
With this mission finished, it’s time to visit Jacob. Only Locke wants to address the entire camp first. He stands before them and says if they’re going to be controlled by Jacob’s commands, they should at least be allowed to see him. His plan? To bring everyone into the jungle, to find Jacob. Alpert leans in to Ben, all, “Ego, much?”
They begin their long day’s journey into night, with Locke letting Ben in on a little secret. They aren’t going to meet Jacob in order to be reunited with the rest of his Oceanic friends. Locke’s purpose behind visiting Jacob … is to kill him.
Questions Answered
Daniel Faraday is dead … right? Guess so, unless the plan to blow up the H-bomb somehow saves him.
Did Faraday do enough to convince Dr. Chang not to build the hatch? We’d say so. He certainly convinced him enough to evacuate the island.
What’s going to happen to Sawyer and Juliet now that Radzinsky has blown their cover? They’re going to get an all-expenses-paid trip to Ann Arbor, Mich., via the Dharma sub. … Or are they?
What exactly is Richard Alpert’s role in the Ben vs. Widmore battle? We’re pretty much deduced that the battle is larger than two men. As for Alpert, however, his official job title is Adviser.
New Questions To Be Asked
Why does Locke want to kill Jacob?
Will detonating the bomb really be the equivalent of hitting a reset button?
Will Richard Alpert and Ben allow Locke to continue to lead the Others?
Is Richard telling the truth when he says he saw Jack, Kate et al die?
Photo: Credit: Mario Perez/ABC