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Casting Calls

New “Gladiators” Wanted — No Mullet Required

As you may have heard, possibly from Channel Guide Magazine, NBC is “reinventing” the “classic” (at least, according to ESPN Classic) early ’90s competition series American Gladiators. But in order to do that, they first need some competitors — and some gladiators. If you feel you fit either of these bills (of course, none of you will ever be able to replace “Lace” in my heart of hearts), the network invites you to try out and prove it. According to NBC, what they are looking for in “contenders” are “weekend warriors who have excelled and take pride in their level […]

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Sports

Notre Dame At Michigan: The Battle Of Who Stinks Less

I’m pretty sure that this isn’t what ABC had in mind when they scheduled the Notre Dame at Michigan game on national TV (Saturday at 3:30pm ET). Both teams are 0-2 after Michigan was upset by Appalachian State and then got pummeled 39-7 by Oregon (both losses at home), and now they’ll be without QB Chad Henne. Notre Dame lost to Georgia Tech and Penn State by a combined score of 64-13. Touchdown Jesus is not pleased. This is the first time in history both teams have been 0-2 at the same time. Both teams’ seasons are wrecked, but one […]

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Reality TV

A Few Brushes Short Of An Artist

I am addicted to The Pickup Artist. No, not the Molly Ringwald/Robert Downey, Jr. ’87 classic. VH1’s reality show about attracting the opposite sex. Cue the Little River Band classic “Lonesome Loser.” By now, we’re down to the final four. We have Brady, whose weakness is that he wants perfection. Pradeep, who has trouble listening to women (translated: talks too much). There’s Kosmo who tends to yell inappropriate remarks in the middle of his stand-up routine. Wait, my bad. That’s the guy who plays Cosmo Kramer. This Kosmo is intimidated by beauty. And then there’s Joe D. who has been […]

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Family

High School Musical vs. The World

Alexander the Great couldn’t pull it off. Napoleon failed. Hitler — close, but no cigar. All of these would-be-world conquerors have nothing on the phenomenon that is High School Musical, which has pretty quickly, and rather insidiously, enveloped the planet. Its latest sequel, High School Musical 2, recently shattered cable records in America and now looks to take over other international markets. Just in case you feel you have not fully lived the High School Musical experience — even though you have seen the films, attended the concerts, read the books, watched the ice show, continue to dab a little […]

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Comedy

Pret-tay, Pret-tay Good Return.

With Tony Soprano whacked (come on, do you really want to debate me on this?) and Entourage on hiatus until ’08, I was all excited about canceling my HBO subscription. Then, a few weeks ago, I heard that quirky theme song with “New Episodes in September” taunting me. Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in. Sunday night, after a Sopranos-esque two-year hiatus, Curb Your Enthusiasm made a pret-tay, pret-tay good premiere. Larry and Cheryl are woken in the middle of the night by a smoke alarm on the fritz. Of course, the malfunctioning smoke alarm […]

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TV News & Program Updates

“A Nice Big Whiff Of Some Ryan Seacrest”

Hey, maybe there is a reason to tune in to the Emmy Awards after all! FOX, which will be carrying the ceremony live on September 16 at 8pm ET (tape-delayed in Pacific Time), announced that two of its most familiar network stars will be making a guest appearance on the broadcast. Stewie and Brian of Family Guy will be doing one of their trademark musical numbers to honor the year in TV as they “magically appear on the Emmy stage,” in the words of Ken Ehrlich, executive producer of the awards telecast. The process by which the animated duo will […]

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Sports

Channel Guide’s Pigskin Preparedness Primer

I have a tradition of writing a football preview in our company newsletter, Joined In Progress (JIP), every September. Since our office is located in Milwaukee and our parent office is in Chicago, and there is much animosity and trash talk between our two cities’ football fans, I always try to throw some fuel on the fire with an equally scathing preview of the Chicago Bears and Green Bay Packers. Anyway, I thought it would be fun to go public and share the preview with the masses (both of you guys). JIP Pigskin Preparedness Primer JIP’s NFL Insider Cubicle QB […]

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Sports

Uh … Football?

Man, these two-day work weeks are killing me. I tuned in to the NFL Kickoff Special last night on NBC. Mrs. Cubicle QB walks in while Kelly Clarkson is belting out some song, and asks me, “What the hell are you watching?” I’m like, “Uh … football?” I generally hate musical acts before sports events. I’m compiling a list of bands and artists that I want banned from all sports venues (and some of them are bands that I actually like). Having John Mellencamp also perform was like a swift kick to the privates, since we already have to suffer […]

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TV News & Program Updates

Better Late Than Never! — Fall Preview Updates

Well, wouldn’t you know it, but those crazy TV networks went and changed a few dates for their programming premieres for this upcoming fall season — and right after we went to print with our special Fall Preview edition of Channel Guide magazine. Ah, the perils of the TV magazine biz … But they haven’t totally thwarted us. We’re here with their late-breaking updates to make sure that you have all of the pertinent information ammunition that you need to make this upcoming fall season your best viewing one yet: * Nip/Tuck — The fifth season premiere of the hit […]

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TV News & Program Updates

GSN “Grand Slam” Marathon And Finale Update

GSN made some changes to its game-show tournament Grand Slam schedule after Channel Guide Magazine went to press (GSN messed with the wrong people). Because the changes affect the last episodes of the season, we thought we’d let you know about them. And because we love you, too. So here’s the revised Grand Slam schedule: Saturday, Sept. 1 at 7pm ET Featuring semifinal matches: Jennings-Harris winner vs. Kitt-Carpenter winner & Rutter-Ogas winner vs. Pawlowicz-Legler winner Encore showings Sept. 1 at 10pm ET, Sept. 5 at 8pm ET and Sept. 6 at 10pm ET. Saturday, Sept. 8 at 12pm ET GRAND […]