How I Met Your Mother

Over the past few seasons of How I Met Your Mother, Barney has taught us a lot of things about dating — the Lemon Law, the Crazy/Hot Scale, etc. But now we find out that one lesson stands above all others: that of the Platinum Rule. The Platinum Rule takes the Golden Rule — which Barney incorrectly thinks is “Love thy neighbor” — and extends it to the next level: “Never ever, ever, ever love thy neighbor.” Ted’s decision to date Dr. Stella Zinman, the woman who has been removing his butterfly tramp stamp, is the catalyst for Barney’s explanation […]

It’s finally here. The How I Met Your Mother episode we’ve been waiting for ever since slap-bet winner Marshall set the countdown clock at the end of the season premiere: “Slapsgiving.” The episode begins with a quick flashback to when Ted and Robin were still dating — and annoying everyone else by saluting fake military figures who come up in casual conversation, such as General Knowledge, Corporal Punishment and Colonel Stuckinmyteeth. Back in the present, that chemistry is gone and Ted explains to his kids how awkward it is trying to remain friends with your ex. For instance, it makes […]

Ted Mosby is a decent-looking guy, right? He’s got an above-average personality, too, judging from the fact that we’ve all been willing to spend a half-hour a week with him for the past two-plus TV seasons. But is anybody else beginning to question his dating record? Granted, his dating stories are being told a couple of decades in the future and have unfolded over the course of a few years — but by sheer volume, they’re pretty impressive. Almost too impressive. I mean, how many women can one guy date? Particularly a guy who grows up to be Bob Saget? […]

As this week’s episode begins, Barney is regaling Ted with the story of his latest conquest: Meg, a girl who is “so perky and full of life and not at all fake” — or at least that describes her boobs. As the camera pans back, we see that while Barney is painting a word picture of Meg’s breasts for Ted, Lily and Marshall are trying to enjoy a romantic dinner just a few feet away. After a quick montage of Ted’s other recent “jackassery,” Marshall determines that he and Lily need to buy their own apartment — a decision that […]

Posted by Mike Last week’s episode was the best of the season so far. So how does “I’m Not That Guy” try to top it? With John Cho, of course. He’s the guy who played Harold in Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle — the movie that changed people’s perceptions of Neil Patrick Harris and indirectly spawned the awesomeness that is Barney Stinson. Without it, NPH’s career may never have come back from Doogie Howser purgatory. But anyway … The episode begins with Ted working at home to avoid distractions, when two big ones — namely Marshall and Barney […]

Posted by Mike Last week I complained about the decline in the physical appearance of the show’s central cast. Well, I’m happy to report that at least Robin and Ted cleaned up nicely for this episode and actually looked like the Robin and Ted we know and love. Lily still has bad bangs, but it seems a little unreasonable to complain about something like that when an episode is as good as this week’s show. So let’s get on with the recap. As Future Ted tells his kids the story of yet another one of his girlfriends, he can’t recall […]

Before we start this week’s recap, there’s something that needs to be said: Something is not quite right about the third season of How I Met Your Mother — and I’m not talking about Robin’s lame storylines (yet). Maybe I was too distracted by hot early-season guest stars Mandy Moore and Danica McKellar to notice it until now, but everyone on the show looks considerably worse than they did during the first two seasons. Before, Robin was always hot enough that you could understand why Ted went to such lengths in pursuing her. Lily’s bangs and Marshall’s side part are — […]

Two words: “the belt.” At this point, we don’t know what they mean, but Ted does, and as he speaks them over the phone to Barney from the men’s room at McLaren’s, they’ve got him freaking out. Barney also seems to grasp the importance of the belt, while the rest of us must wait for a flashback to “less than 30 minutes ago” to find out what’s going on. And here it is. Ted, Barney and Marshall are headed to McLaren’s. Or, at least, that was the plan, until it took Ted too long to suit up and achieve that […]

This week’s episode (sadly, the first Mandy Moore-less one of the season) begins with Lily and Marshall explaining the concept of “death folders” to Ted and Barney. Should either husband or wife die unexpectedly, the folders are supposed to include any pertinent information that the surviving spouse might need to settle the affairs of the deceased — and, as Marshall learns during the conversation, they are also supposed to include a personal letter. Realizing that all Lily would find upon opening his folder are a bunch of bank statements and a list of funny things to do with his ashes […]