Reality TV

This week’s theme is Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Ryan tells us all about the history of the Hall of Fame and why it’s all important and stuff. It’s like a slide show that automatically moves forward with the ‘ding’ on the cassette tape. Not all that interesting, American Idol. We’re getting started with David Cook. David Cook — Hungry Like the Wolf Ok, first off, David Cook needs to back off the Duran Duran. Seriously. He is not Simon LeBon. Even in his puffier days. And he most certainly isn’t Nigel John Taylor. Not even close dude, not […]

Gotta start with a cheesy group number featuring our final 5. The choreographer has completely given up. The contestants just needed to sit in a certain order when they start with ‘Cracklin’ Rosie.’ Then they had to step-touch to ‘Song Sung Blue.’ They also wow us with ‘Brother Love’s Traveling Salvation Show.’ David Cook brings the creepy by sounding like a charlatan preacher man. Nice. Constantine Maroulis and Gina Glockson are working on American Idol Extra, so they’re shilling. Constantine tries to do the stare into the camera. He can’t really do it. I think his extra doughiness is throwing […]

Ryan Seacrest is wondering if anyone will lose their cool tonight. God willing, someone will. Some chick who looks like Finola Hughes is in the audience. Ryan appeals to us to vote, vote, vote, just like they do in Chicago. So tonight is Neil Diamond night. He’s very sparkly. Ryan mentions that his first number one was ‘I’m a Believer’ for The Monkees. Oh, yeah. Kristy Lee Cook is wishing she were here to “Come Into America” today. Neil has had some work done. It’s not severe, but he’s rather smooth for having as long of a career that he’s […]

We begin this episode with Ryan kissing both Paula and Simon on the top of the head. I’m wondering if he was dared to do that. So my EPG is telling me that Andrew Lloyd Webber is performing tonight. I see now that he’s at the piano. That’s a good thing. The group sing to start the show is ‘All I Ask Of You.’ It’s a duet, but we’ve got 3 guys & 3 girls, so it’s close enough, I guess. They forgo almost all choreography, but you can tell Andrew Lloyd Webber insisted on some kind of harmony. It’s […]

The Idols are being challenged like they’ve never been challenged before. David Duchovny and family are looking forward to that challenge. Maybe that challenge is the fact that every episode they’re told that sounding like you’re on Broadway does not equal sounding like a pop star. So making Andrew Lloyd Webber sound contemporary will be a challenge. The band has been brought onto the stage and is closer to a full orchestra than usual. The Top Six Idols are belched out of the stage again. Brooke looks like she’s going to cry already. Good call, Vote For The Worst. We […]