Family Guy

Posted by Knockturn Picture it: a veterinarian’s office in Quahog. Brian’s in with the doctor trying to find the source of a bowel obstruction while his family anxiously waits in the lobby. Peter makes friends with a parrot and birdnaps it, replacing it with a moustached puppy so that no one will know what he’s done. Turns out that Brian had a used diaper inside him (“I thought it was Indian food!”), and while everyone’s sorting that out, Chris falls for Anna, the vet intern (voiced by Amanda Bynes).

Posted by knockturn Wow, a new episode? Finally … Brian and Stewie are at Joel’s 2nd birthday party when Brian spots a girl across the yard. When she tells him she thinks magicians are hot, he tells her he’s a magician and would be happy to do a show for her kid’s party. Stewie volunteers to be his assistant, but at the party it turns out that this woman has a boyfriend and they they’re completely happy in their fixer-upper relationship, so Brian bails. Turns out that Brian found his soulmate years ago in the form of Tracey Flannigan, to […]

Posted by Sarah Brian’s essay wins first prize in the Rising Writers contest, meaning that he gets a free trip to Martha’s Vineyard and the chance to read part of the essay at a celebratory dinner. And since Peter’s idiocy has been straining his relationship with Lois, Brian invites them to come along and have a vacation. But who’ll watch the kids? Cleveland’s busy, so they decide on Herbert: “You’ve spent time watching children, right?” “Yes, yes I have.” Herbert’s babysitting stint includes a sponge bath (unfortunately, not by the Griffin kid he’d hoped for), Scattergories, and a perverse reading […]

Posted by Sarah At the Drunken Clam, Peter and the gang are watching G.I. Jose: A Real Mexican Hero, and after the little educational bit at the end is a news report about Barry Manilow coming to Quahog. Everyone takes a swipe at Manilow and his pathetic fans before admitting that they totally love him and own everything he’s ever recorded. Flash to the concert, where the four of them are weeping like the fangirls they are. Barry says he needs someone from the audience to sing to onstage, and after rejecting a Claire and a Harriet for incorrect numbers […]

Posted by Sarah Flash floods are a problem all over Quahog … and they’re a great way to stay in shape. Cleveland is evacuated to the stadium, all by himself, even though his house isn’t even getting rained on. The Griffins are not so lucky — their first floor is under water, and when Peter sends Meg into the kitchen to save his six-pack of beer, she gets hooked on the fridge rack and loses consciousness. She’s in a coma, and Peter regrets treating her so badly all her life. He promises to treat her like a princess if she’ll […]

Posted by Sarah Quahog’s Veterans Day celebration is the place to be. During the parade, Peter decides to try “The John McCain Experience”: He crawls into a bamboo cage and is poked with a sharp stick until he starts crying “I wanna be president!” Then Herbert starts singing “I’m Proud to Be an American” with a children’s choir, and the whole town is moved to tears. The performance inspires Peter to be the most patriotic he can be, which for him means wearing a sparkly American flag suit that Stewie says makes him look like the Statue of Liberty’s pimp. […]

Posted by Sarah At the courthouse, Peter tells Lois he wants to hear all about her non-death … not that night, because he has plans, but definitely the next night. We see a replay of Lois falling over the back of the ship after Stewie shoots her. Luckily, a passing merman took her to shore and treated her, then asked permission to make love to her. Problem was, he had the head and torso of a fish, and the legs of a man. Lois refused to sleep with him, he got angry (“I think you kind of owe me”) and […]

Posted by Sarah We finally made it to the 100th episode, and such an occasion deserves … a recap special! Hosted by Seth MacFarlane, the half-hour special looked back at some of his favorite Family Guy moments and heard from regular people just how horrible his show really is, but the best parts were his comments in between segments: “We celebrate 100 episodes of doing just enough to get by.” “We look back at the show that turned me from a poor, Vietnamese immigrant into a Caucasian millionaire.” “Dharma and Greg … what an awful awful show.” “[He laughs] I […]